The Great Indian Wedding

Weddings are serious affairs. If you sit and observe people around you at such ceremonies, you will surely have a good laugh, just like I did at this recent sangeet ceremony I was attending.

I ate quickly and had some time on my hands while my parents were still stuck in the queue. While sitting idle, I made some observations. Here they are.

North Indian weddings have a large buffet spread with people standing in little groups, leaning over a food station, confusing other guests from where to start and where to end. At times, guests are so busy chatting while eating that if you walk past them and grab a bite from their plate, they might not even notice, because it is already loaded with everything on the menu.

Gulab jamuns are served at almost 99% of occasions. Therefore, if you have a gulab jamun in your plate and your plate loses balance, do not panic! It will roll and land into someone else’s plate. Yes, people do stand very close with these huge plates in hand.

Most guests at these buffet counters don’t actually know if they have to serve themselves, moving in a line from left to right or right to left. So the next time you find a bunch of confused lot bumping into each other with plates, know that this is the actual reason.

If you thought that the younger generation enjoyed at these weddings by flaunting their low waist sarees even in extreme winters or a young boy finding his true love (like the Bollywood style), think again! It is actually the older generation that does so. They vent out their pent up frustration on peoples’ clothing, food, decoration, gift items and everything that is present at the function and that is when they feel a little closer to achieving moksha.

It was time for us to head back home. I had a good laugh looking at everyone around. When we were about to leave we heard a man burping loudly. I am sure he must have tried his best to camouflage his burp sound with the loud music, but little did he know.