Four tips for choosing the right partner- In Pursuit of The One

Tanu Sharma
2 min readJun 23, 2020
Image Source Unsplash

Most of us reach a point in our lives where we feel like finding a partner for life. Choosing a partner to marry can be a tough task. Arranged marriage being the norm in India, parents have certain criteria for shortlisting the bride and groom. However, no one ever tells you what questions to ask when you are talking to your partner. While there are many things that could make or break a relationship, there are a few points one can keep in mind while interacting with potential future partners. Here are some of my thoughts on the subject.

Setting the right expectations

Let the other person know clearly of what you expect and what you do not from the marriage. It is important to have conversations regarding your mutual expectation such as living with the in-laws or separately, plans for further studies, finances and family culture to name a few.

Being honest

It is very important for each partner to accept the other the way they are. So be truthful and let them know the real you. That is what you will have to live with for your entire life. Creating a false impression will land you in lifelong trouble. For example, if you enjoy smoking cigarettes, be upfront about it. It is better to have the person walk away now than discover such a habit of yours later in the marriage, which will lead to unnecessary stress.

Assessing social skills

Pick up some general topics for discussion and exchange views. Their answers can reveal a lot about their thought process. It will also help you gauge their skills at making conversation. You should also try taking him or her out along with your friends. If it is important to you that your partner matches your wavelength in terms of social skills, this assessment could potentially save you from the frustrations of dealing with socially awkward situations borne out of your partner’s extreme reluctance or exuberance to socialize.

Weekend activity matters

Asking questions about how they spend their weekends or holidays could give you a good insight into their hobbies and areas of interest. In addition, it may help in understanding if he/she is an extrovert or an introvert.

These are just a few things to keep in mind. It is impossible to list out every single intricate detail that you need to verify while zeroing in on a potential partner for life.

So, as a last resort, let your intuition be your guide. It will seldom lead you down the wrong path.

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